


marriage story

by dutiesofcare



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Original Trilogy
Genre: Chaos, Domestic, Domestic Fluff, F/M, Family, Humor, Pranks, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-13
Updated: 2021-03-13
Packaged: 2021-03-21 13:33:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,727
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30022518
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dutiesofcare/pseuds/dutiesofcare
Summary: “Han got drunk last night and tried to set our marriage certificate on fire. He said — Good luck trying to return me without the receipt, sweetheart.”
Relationships: Leia Organa & Luke Skywalker, Leia Organa & Luke Skywalker & Han Solo, Leia Organa/Han Solo
Comments: 10
Kudos: 35





	marriage story

**Author's Note:**

> because I breathe and the mamma mia gc gives me another prompt to write

He’s not unused to them fighting. 

In fact, a good indicator that Leia and Han are in a good place in their relationship is that they _are_ fighting. 

He hates the bantering; he’s always been a man of peace and easy resolutions — the stoicism of a Jedi, he would dare to say — and their constant bantering brings back far too many memories of their time in the rebellion before love confessions were made in which they would unleash all their unresolved sexual tension by loudly screaming at each other across the halls of wherever headquarter in an almost uninhabitable world they were lodged at all. 

He hated the unending bantering back then and he hates it now, but he's used to it. If bantering makes them happy, then they’ll have his full support to waste their life away deriding one another — after all, they're allowed the privacy of their own _kinks_. 

So, when he walks uninvitedly into their fancy private pent in the senatorial sector of Hosnian Prime one lazy afternoon, he's not surprised to be immediately welcomed by the tension in the air. 

He is, however, somehow flustered that his first sight inside their home is the single suitcase placed in the middle of the living room — and he _knows_ that suitcase is making a statement, he's just a little terrified to learn what it's about. 

His brother-in-law is nowhere to be seen, but Luke can hear him loudly making a fuss somewhere inside the house. _Another statement_ , he’s certain. He’s not sure if he wants to know what that's all about _either_. 

His sister, though, is sitting gracefully by the couch, sipping a glass of wine, clearly unbothered. He frowns at her, perplexed that she doesn't seem to mind whatever that her husband of years is up to. If she senses his presence there, she doesn't show it, so he walks up to her and inelegantly drops down on the couch next to her. 

She sighs; apparently, his mere existence is bothering her more than her crazy husband taking down their house. 

“Bad time?” he poses, obtusely, and she looks at him through her lashes. 

“What gave it away?” she asks ironically. 

“The suitcase.”

At that, Leia takes a long sip of her wine. 

“What's that all about?” Luke makes the question that's been on the tip of his tongue ever since he arrived and generally points at the hall that leads to the bedrooms, before gesturing his head towards the bag. 

Leia shrugs; she couldn't care _less._

“Han is throwing a tantrum because I tossed him out.”

Of all the things he’s expecting to hear, _that_ wasn't even on the bottom of his list, and he chokes. Outwardly chokes, to the point she gives a glare at the hideous sounds he’s making with his throat. 

“You did — _what_?!”

Leia rolls her eyes, wondering what sin of her past life she was paying to end up with not one but _two_ overly dramatic men in her life. 

“He was being a baby,” she says serenely, as if that's nothing unusual nor anything to stress about. 

Or, as if she _really_ wants him out. 

Luke pulls at the collar of his shirt, trying to make it easier to breathe. “Can I… Can I have a little more context than that?”

She looks at him angrily. 

“I mean—” Luke stutters, intimidated by her eyes on him. “Maybe that's a little overdramatic, don't you think?”

“I most certainly do _not_ ,” Leia emphasizes. 

“Please don't make me beg, Leia,” he asks again, and he's evidently begging already. 

Leia rolls her eyes again. 

“If you must know,” she mutters in concession, “Han got drunk last night and threatened to set our marriage certificate on fire. He said, and I quote — _good luck trying to return me without the receipt_.”

Inevitably, Luke brings his hand to his mouth, trying to hide the sneer on his lips from his sister’s mood. If anything, that's the most _Han_ thing ever. 

It's even sort of romantic, he would say if he weren't so afraid of his twin sister. 

But back to the matter of hand, his mind fails to make the bridge between the story and his best friend suddenly being evicted from his own house. 

“Okay — and what did you do?”

Leia shoots her shoulders up and down. 

“I said if I don't have the receipt to return him anymore, I’ll simply toss him out.”

Luke chokes again, but he keeps it quieter this time. 

“I see that he didn't take it well?”

“He's been packing all day,” Leia dismisses it, “ _Or_ , he's been pretending to pack all day. Han doesn't have enough personal belongings that would take him a _whole day_ to pack, and the last time I checked on him, he was simply throwing his clothes all over the floor.”

Her eyes wander towards the suitcase in the middle of the living room. 

“There's also the small technical issue that his _only_ bag is right here, so I’m not certain of what he's actually up to in there.”

“And you're not at least slightly curious to find out?”

“ _Han_ has the attention center of a loth-cat. Sooner or later, he’ll come crawling back to me to make sure I’m aware of his deeds.”

Like he’s just been summoned, the twins hear steps coming from the hall, and suddenly a certain _husband_ strokes into the living room, banging his feet loudly against the floor. _Another statement,_ and Luke is highly curious as to what it might be.

He isn’t ready, however, for Han to suddenly appear wearing literally _all_ of his clothes — and perhaps even some of hers?

Luke loudly gasps, although Leia remains unfazed. The expression on her face barely shifts into either annoyance or amusement.

“Hey, kid,” Han greets Luke with his unusually grave voice, and he clearly doesn’t mind _at all_ what he’s making a fool of himself in front of his brother-in-law. In fact, he barely acknowledges that anything out of the ordinary might be happening.

Leia eyes him up and down meticulously, swirling the glass of wine on her lifted hand.

“You’re going out?” she asks, innocently, using the same monotonous tone she’d work on her political adversaries. 

He places his hands on each side of the top jacket he’s wearing, smugly fixing it around himself.

“As a matter of fact, I am _not_.”

She remains indifferent, like it barely makes a difference to _her_ whether he chooses to stay or go.

“That doesn’t seem like a very comfortable stay-at-home outfit,” she judges, bringing her legs up to the couch to prove just how comfortable she is on her sweatpants and a loose shirt, just how much motion she still has from it.

“It is very cozy,” he admits, trying to gain points for himself.

She makes a face, “It is 30°C outside.”

“Maybe I _like_ staying warm.”

“Well, I just hope you won’t start _smelling_ , then.”

“I have never smelled bad in my whole life.”

Leia tilts her head. “You smelled pretty sweaty last night in bed after we—”

“I’m still here,” Luke announces loudly, dreading to know just _where_ that sentence would lead. From Han’s smirk, he knows it can’t be anything _good_ for a puritan brother to hear. 

He looks back at Leia, then at Han, then at Leia, then at Han, and the two of them had entered a staring match and _no one_ will break the silence and satisfy his curiosity of _why_ Han is doing — whatever the fuck he’s doing.

He’s well aware that they’re playing a game, but he doesn’t have time for his games, so he sighs and asks in defeat, “Why are you wearing all that, Han?”

“Well, Luke, if you _must_ know,” Han prompts, although his eyes don't leave her. “ _Somebody_ walked on me earlier today and when this somebody noticed all my clothes thrown to the floor, as I was doing her the _favor_ of tossing out everything of mine that doesn’t have a returning receipt, and instead of appreciating my romantic gestures, she threatens to throw everything out if I don’t fix my mess.”

Luke looks at him intently, and his brain just _can’t_ make the connection between the story and his current — display of clothes. 

“Okay…” he mutters, once he realizes that Leia still clings tightly to her silence. “And that led you to put your every piece of clothing because…?”

Han eyes Leia daringly, his trademark smirk on his face as he tells her, “Well, sweetheart, I’d like to see you _try_.”

Leia slowly licks the form of her lips with her tongue. “Is that a dare?”

“Yes.”

“You know that I succeed in everything that I attempt to _do_ , right?”

Han’s face is now written with suspicion. “If I recall _correctly_ , you failed to make _toast_ just last week.”

“Apart from that—”

“Didn’t you also turn all my white underwear _pink_ because you ‘accidentally’ put your red lingerie alongside in the washing machine? I can continue.”

“There’s no need,” she pouts, understanding his point and dismissing it. She gets up, placing her glass of wine on the coffee table, and walks up to her. Her eyes are bigger than usual, and she’s got that innocent look on her face that she _knows_ he can’t resist. She’s full of pride when she notices him swallowing roughly at her callous approach. “I can make you so hot that you’ll be begging me to rip all those clothes out of you.”

“And _that’s_ my cue to leave,” Luke grunts, and his presence there is completely forgotten. He’s almost _thankful_ that they don’t give him attention as he walks away.

“ _I’d like to see you try, sweetheart,_ ” Luke hears him say just as he gratefully steps out of the apartment.

* * *

It’s about one hour later when Luke is disturbed midway through his meditation when his comm buzzes next to him.

He sees Han’s name there, and he rolls his eyes. He hopes he’s calling to apologize for the awkward position he and his sister had put him through.

Instead—

“Hey, kid, can you do me a favor?”

Luke knows he’s going to regret it the moment he agrees to it.

“Yes, Han, what is it?”

“Can you — Can you bring me a spare pair of clothes? Leia has locked me outside just on my undies.”

**Author's Note:**

> honestly, idk what this is.
> 
> but if you laughed, leave me a comment lmao


End file.
